Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Can't focus until I get this off my chest...

What the hell am I doing out here? Ten million miles away from home...not a dime to go back, or even to give back, for that matter. What's money got to do with it anyway? All it does is give a person a reason to be a complete dip shit. It can't perform miracles. All you've got is life. And in this life, all you've got is your will to rely on. I just wish I could turn things around, that's all. I don't think I've ever felt so selfish as I do now. I have no business being out here in Santa Barbara. I need to be with my family. School is school. But family--you've only got one of those, and it hurts like hell to see your team mates go down. I just want to be home. I want to be with my mom. My aunt. My grandma.


I just want to run back home. Get away from it all. The money. The stress. The debt. The separation.

Fuck.


I love you, Auntie Diana.

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