H: Do you ever think about...you know...how we always talk again after some stupid argument, and then start talking again, and stop talking....do you ever think we'll get to that point where we just stop completely and don't talk to each other at all ever again?

M: I don't know...why, do you want to stop talking?

H: If you're going to be this way, then yes.

M: What way?

H: Your...its your whole attitude. Like the other day when you just up and left, and now...these past few minutes were just ruined because you always have to take things so seriously...."what am I to you?"...shit like that. You're just too emotional.


As I sit here, once again within these deep, dark four corners, trying to make sense of all those damn fluffy "emotions" of mine, Yann Tiersen prolongs these feelings of taunt and regret with the soft hum of a harmonica, followed by the delicate dance of keys. "La Dispute"--such a chillingly accurate description of my secret journey into the night. You tell me one thing but your actions speak otherwise. Perhaps the age-old expression is true--actions speak louder than words. I just wish the two would come to a happy, sensible agreement so I could at last make sense of this whole situation. It wouldn't matter. I've made a habit of brushing off the angel on my shoulder to play yet another game of Russian Roulette. It still hasn't worked. Therefore, in an attempt to "follow my heart", I'm not going to take those chances any longer. However, I need to come to terms with this whole situation. What am I doing? Where am I going? Why? I don't want to sacrifice myself anymore. I just wish there were blueprints for these sorts of things.